


Midwestern Death Tour: The Beginning

by mediarahan



Series: Starving Musicianstuck [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Gen, Multi, Starving Musicianstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-09
Updated: 2012-04-13
Packaged: 2017-11-03 09:04:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/379650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mediarahan/pseuds/mediarahan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Math-punk basement sensation FUCKASSES prepare for their tour of the midwest with special guest The Psiionic;  Rose and Kanaya book gigs all over NYC because of their promising addition of sick beats; Eridan is seethingly jealous, but Feferi just spots an opportunity for fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. San Francisco, California

"I think we're gonna die, Aradia."

"What, of starvation?" She laughed, rolling onto her back to look at Sollux, huddled in a corner amidst miscellaneous cables and terminals.

"Probably," He chuckled in response. Keys clacked away under his fingers and Aradia slid off the bed onto all fours to crawl next to him.

"Well if you keep handing out your programs for free..."

"Aradia, you of all people know that-" She grabbed his face in her hands.

"Sorry... sorry," She said with a smile, then a little more desperately. Her voice lowered to almost a whisper, "I was kidding. You're doing a good thing, Sollux." His shoulders dropped and he exhaled slowly.

"I know." He sighed again and kissed her quickly, careful to avoid her medusa piercing. He got up and sat at the computer desk on the adjacent walls. Aradia slowly walked back to her bed and picked up her guitar and began tuning it as he searched through emails.

"I think we're going to die because Karkat can't get his shit together enough to book these fucking venues for the right dates."

Aradia looked up and laughed, "Did he-?"

"Kansas City BEFORE Wichita, again," He cut her off. She got up and calmly removed his hands from the keyboard before he threw it into the monitor.

"I think you'll be stretching yourself a little thin, anyways," He bared his teeth for a second, "I'd like you to come back from this tour alive."


	2. Houston, Texas

"L4444444444444444M3," Dave could hear the numbers in her shout and he recoiled a little from his phone.

"Whatever, what's lamer is how this lesbian string duet has been sounding without my sick beats," He moved the phone away instinctively as Terezi wailed into it again, "Come on man, what even is your deal doling out lameness awards like I'm fucking Peter Jackson or something?"

"Everyone's going on tour, I'm going to be all alone with no one to talk to."

"Not EVERYONE, T. Tavros and his band and Aradia are all gonna be where they usually are, though I can't really account for what that douchebag who masturbates all over his delay pedal on stage and calls it 'performance art' is gonna do once he finds out about this." Terezi sighed on the other end.

"I guess I'll just see you when you get back then, LOS3R," She stuck her tongue out, audibly, but Dave stayed totally cool about how impressive that was. 

"Love you, too, Terezi," Dave deadpanned and listened to her cackle and hang up.


	3. Chicago, Illinois

"I can't believe Equius is really going to cram all of us and our gear into his sweaty fucking man van and haul our asses to Cleveland. And I'm the last stop so I get to greet all of your scowling fucking faces and deaf ears blown off by his abysmal taste in music-"

"Karkat would you shut up, I have to let Nepeta into my apartment for two days because she didn't want to make her bff drive the extra two hours to Milwaukee," Vriska snarled, picking at a stain on what did not appear to be but actually was a couch.

"At least Nepeta can make gourmet ramen, which we won't even be able to AFFORD on this tour." Vriska huffed.

"Yeah unless your stupid famous-in-LA friend rakes in the cash for us," She opened the fridge and quickly closed it before the smell could embed itself in her nostrils again, "And you're just saying that because you're totally hot for that freckly fat little weeaboo nekochan."

"Don't fucking call her that you stupid bitch!" Vriska smirked.

"You have such a huge booooooooner for her, Karkitten!"

"Vriska we don't need any fucking band drama before we're even in each others faces, shut the FUCK up." She cackled and hung up, convinced her bandmate was adequately riled and ready to shout his lungs out 24/7 for the next month.


	4. Kansas City, Missouri

"I see you are all packed for your train ride," Equius peered into the background of the image on his monitor to make sure the girl bouncing in and out of the picture wasn't procrastinating again.

"Nepeta always packs ahead when she gets to see her furriends!" She paused for a minute to stick her tongue out at her webcam. Equius tensed.

"Very well, I apologise for my low expectations, but I must make sure you are bringing enough food. Vriska is not particularly..." Nepeta held an armful of instant ramen up to her monitor before dropping it into a canvas grocery bag.

"Don't be silly, Equius! I know the consequences will be eating spiders until you come save us," She gave him her usual strikingly cat-like grin, "Besides, I want us to have food on our tour! Karkitty needs to eat sometimes and I will see to it that he does!" 

Equius smiled a little at his companion's relentless concern for their domineering band leader. Nepeta settled down into a chair and whisked her hair away from her face.

"Did you get the van fixed up?"

"Y-yes, I... had to dismantle a few of my creations to optimize comfort and fuel efficiency, but it shall be ready to go tomorrow."

"Ooh, what'd you put in it?" Nepeta leaned forward with her face in her hands. Equius smiled a little more openly now.

"That will be a surprise, Miss Nepeta. But I assure you, everyone should be very pleased with my modifications. Even Karkat." Equius pictured the look of enraged joy on the band leader's face once he saw the gasoline cans of RC cola that would dispense to the rear seats inside the van. A little bead of sweat raced down his cheek.


	5. New York, New York

"...Twelve?"

"Yes, Twelve."

"Kanaya, we don't even have a name. How in the world did you convince twelve separate venues to give us money when we are unnamed and unheard of?"

"Mister Strider seems to have made something of a name for himself. Besides, I'm a rather frightening presence in this city."

"I can't imagine," Rose smirked. She stepped onto the busy platform and maneuvered her violin case away from any passersby ready to crash into it.

"Well," Kanaya paused to let out a small yawn, "Don't let the morning rush trample you. Maybe we can threaten our ironic beatmaster into thinking up something clever for us tonight."

"Don't count on it, you know how he gets under pressure."

"Worse," They said simultaneously.

"By the way, dear," Rose said as she looked up at the high rise apartment building across the street, "I'm right outside and I'd like to see you in the elevator."


	6. Miami, Florida

"Fef, have you _seen_ this?" Eridan said, rolling his eyes.

"Yes, Eridan, Aradia and Sollux have been telling me all about it," She left her goggles on for a moment longer so she could discreetly glare at her screen.

"An how long have you been talkin' to them?!" 

"Oh, a few months," She said, donning her glasses and shaking her damp hair free of its restraints.

"Why didn't you tell me, Fef? We gotta do somethin' about it!" Eridan shouted. Feferi sighed to herself.

"It's not a competition, Eridan. I'm really excited for them, I bet it's going to be a lot of fun!" She protested.

"Are you kiddin' me? They got all these shows and we got nothin'!"

"And we all live on opposite corners of the country. Why can't you just leave them alone and be h-" Eridan was already talking over her.

"Seattle ain't that far from Portland, if the gimp can cram himself into a car we can..." Feferi glared directly into the camera.

"I don't appreciate you calling Tavros a 'gimp', Eridan," Her tone dropped, "But we could..." She trailed off.

"Fef what're you smiling for...?" Eridan said with a wrinkle of his nose.


End file.
